What I Really Want

What I Really Want

It’s RARE I have a morning alone.  But today is one of those blessed days.   I mean, I love my kiddos and my man — don’t get me wrong — but the kids spent the night at Aunt Jessica’s (after a day of negotiating and some serious 10-year old manipulation.  That kid should be a lawyer!), and the husband had an early morning appointment with a pool.

So, I’ve had some time to study and plan and reflect (and clean) and the Lord has softly spoken to my heart and asked me to share.  I’ll make this quick because the troops will march back home any minute.

Jesus is my first love.  I don’t understand exactly how He has won me over, but He has.  By His grace.  Because heaven knows I’m self-centered and arrogant and without the grace of God I’d be a hot mess.  But His pursuit is real and the more I surrender, the more I change.  And this morning I can honestly say that more than anything in life I desperately WANT EVERYTHING God has for me.  I want to know Him.  I want to be used by Him.  I want to make a difference in the lives of people around me for His glory.  I really do.  My heart aches toward that goal everyday.  And I’m asking Him for it.  Finally.

Everyday.

I don’t always obey.  I don’t always get it.  I fail more than I even want to think about.  I’m so far from perfect and so far from being like Jesus I don’t even know how any of it is possible, but it IS what I want.

Here’s what hit me as I was watering some plants on my balcony: MOST people don’t.  My heart physically hurts this morning, burdened by the reality that most people I interact with on  a daily and weekly basis, at their core do not care about what God wants for them.  At least not enough for it to matter.

Many of them are Christians.  At least they say or think they are one.

It makes me so sad.  Sad is the best word to describe it.  Not like a “You’re so sad you make me sick” attitude.  No.  A genuine sadness born out of God’s love for others.  He so beautifully and willingly wants people’s hearts, wants to bless, wants to give, wants to have a relationship with them, wants to change them, wants to heal them, wants to give them a life of purpose and abundance, wants to LOVE them — but no.

People don’t want what God wants.  People don’t really want God.  They may want the blessings of God, but they don’t really want Him and they don’t want more than anything else the things He wants.

And I’m guilty too.

Which also makes me sad.

There are days that I MORE want success in business, affirmation from people and security in life.  Safety.  Comfort . The American Dream.  I want those things sometimes.  But, once God gets a true hold on your heart and His truth has penetrated your mind, you can’t really stay there.  You go back to Him and slowly but surely your desires change and you just want Him.

I don’t know how it all looks.  I don’t know how it all will work itself out. I just know that with every fiber of my being I want all God has for me and I want it for you too.

What do you really want?


The Curse of a “Good” Life

I’m sure your life is good.  Normal.  Your life is a perfect picture of someone living out the American dream.  Life is not perfect.  You have your ups and downs.  But, you have a family and have landed a decent job.  Fun, social events and day trips fill your calendar.  Maybe you even attend church sometimes.  Anyone observing your day-to-day activities would conclude that things are, well, good.

Tonight as I sat in my living room floor, Bible open, King Hezekiah study on my lap and listening to a young woman who attends our weekly gathering talk, I realized something.   She was right.  While I don’t think she’d mind, I’ll keep her name to myself, but she said, “I don’t think most people realize how miserable they are.  They have nothing else to compare their life to.”  She went on to explain that before she started following Christ, she thought she had a great life.  She wasn’t unhappy.  She wasn’t depressed.  She wasn’t even looking for something different.  She was normal.

I pray someone reading this right now feels that same way — good and normal.  You are whom I’m talking to today.  Have you ever considered that there is more?  Have you ever wondered why “radical Christians” act the way they do?  They commit their lives to serving a God they can’t see, are passionate about church activities and Bible study and they do some weird things.  Perhaps they go out of their way, unnecessarily in your opinion, to take strong stands on issues and you feel sorry for them when they get slammed with the “don’t judge me” card.  Why do they care so much?  You don’t get it.  You respect it, but you don’t get it.

May I challenge you with something?  What if for one year, 2014, you determined to explore what they seem to have found?   What if you joined a Bible study and went to church regularly?   Not a church where tradition reigns.  Go to one where Christ is King and everyone knows it.  Go to one where the Bible is read and taught and God is praised.  Go to one where people are focused on sharing the good news of salvation around the world.  Participate in the classes and learn the teachings.  Ask hard questions and as you grow in knowledge continue to consider  “is there more?”

What might your life be like in a year if you did that?  Is that too weird to even ask?

When my friend started paying attention to God and began to understand what it meant to be a Christian, her life didn’t really change.  Same family.  Same job.  Same social events.  But she changed.  Her heart changed.  Her mind changed and eventually most everything else did to.  She found truth, joy, peace and purposes she’d never known existed.  She learned of God’s love and began to desire His best.  Soon, the old life…you know, the normal, good one…was no longer appealing and it certainly was no longer enough.  She tried to go back, but she couldn’t.  She was miserable in the life that used to seem so good.  She had to move on with Christ.

Over and over again I’ve heard stories so similar to this one.  I call it the Jesus effect.  Having a relationship with Him changes people…. as it should.  HE CHANGES PEOPLE. The beautiful thing is that it is always for the better.

Could it be that you presume your life is good because you’ve never experienced God’s best?  Once you taste His goodness, nothing else satisfies. Every time I’ve been tempted — and I have — to abandon my faith and walk away from my beliefs, I’m left with nowhere to go.  Who can compare to my God?  What other truth can I stand on?  What else can I build my life on?  To whom shall I go?  Better is one day in the courts of my God than a thousand elsewhere.

If I sound crazy, you’ve been cursed with a good life.

I dare you to come and see.


Prayer is good, but…

Yea, my first blog post as part of Life in Progress Ministries!  Very exciting times.  Klinton, myself and our spouses are anticipating that God will accomplish great things and open many doors of opportunity for this ministry.

I want to share something on my mind and heart today, a conviction really.  All of us can relate to going through times when we had no clue what to do.  We had no clue what our next move should be, no clue what to think or how to behave.  So, we began to pray.  Prayer is good.  Prayer changes things.  There IS power in prayer.  Prayer is the way we communicate with God; giving thanks, asking for provision, begging for help, repenting of sin…you know the drill.  But, have you ever considered that prayer is an incomplete way to communicate with God?

“Read More”

Klinton and I were discussing this morning how desperately we need fresh knowledge of God.  We need to know who He is and what He wants.  God is an incomprehensible and complex being. (Which is what makes a relationship with Him forever thrilling!) There is so much to know!  Ironically, as I minister to women,most — if not all — are faithfully praying.  They need help.  They need encouragement.  They need comfort.  They need answers.  They need hope.  They NEED.  And prayer is a proper response.  Please don’t get me wrong.  But, I’m wondering if prayer is enough?  Prayer is YOUR word to God.  What you and I most need is HIS word to us.  We need knowledge for decision making, knowledge for understanding, knowledge for comfort, and knowledge for life.  We need to know.

I have been guilty of only praying and expecting answers.  I’m learning that God speaks to me through prayer, but more directly and more personally through His word.  There have been times in my life that I have tried to take spiritual shortcuts to get answers.  I’ve asked someone else, read articles, watched TV programs and read blogs.  To be honest, at times the answers I found did pacify, but they never satisfied.  I’ve learned not to sacrifice Biblical knowledge under the banner of prayer.  Pray.  Prayer is beautiful and necessary.  But, also open your Bible and discover God for yourself.  Reading and studying and meditating on the Word of God is life-changing and life-giving.  It is the Word that gives life.  Jesus said,  “it is the Spirit who gives life, the flesh profits nothing.  The words that I speak to you are spirit and they are life.”  Jesus said man should not live by bread alone, but by every word that proceeds out of the mouth of God. God’s word should be life to the believer.  Yet, so few self-proclaimed believers know the Bible.  Does anybody else see the problem?

I love these verses that so eloquently explain why we have the written Word:

For whatever was written in former days was written for our instruction, that through endurance and through the encouragement of the scriptures we might have hope.  Romans 15:4 (ESV)

All scripture is given by inspiration of God and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness: that the man of God may be perfect, thoroughly furnished unto all good works.  2 Timothy 3:16-17

The more I study the Bible, the more I realize how much I need it and how complete it is in covering my every need; spiritually, emotionally, intellectually and physically.   It is the scriptures that change me.  It is the scriptures that reveal God to me.  It is the scriptures that give me hope, purpose and direction for my life.  Sadly, I am often guilty of passively reviewing the Bible or depending on someone else to teach me what it says and what it means.  The Holy Spirit desires to be our teacher…God…your teacher.  Who better?  Don’t take the shortcuts for finding answers.  Gain the knowledge you need for your life.  Pray.  Go to church.  But, take time to study and examine God’s word for yourself.

“The scriptures are written for our use and benefit, as much as for those to whom they were first given.  Those are most learned who are most mighty in the Scriptures.”  Matthew Henry